Frustrations

Today was an experiment with Fun Times. My support person told me to see what happened if I ignored him all day. I gave him directions and included him in activities, but if he decided to wander off to let him. He has a lot of attention-seeking behaviors and we wanted to see if he escalated or not if we weren't watching. It actually reduced my stress level a lot. He tried pretty hard to get our attention by making noise, going by my desk, etc. and we didn't budge. I don't know what will become of this. I'll just have to see. He's having accidents, and my support person also told me that because they only occur in the gym, to keep him in the classroom during recess AND gym to see if it's a gym thing, or a time of day thing. I'm not excited about having to keep him in the room that much, but it does seem like a good way to narrow things down. Sigh. He needs a place to run around, but I've had about enough of him and his accidents. He's not all tortured and abused, I'm 99% sure he's doing it on purpose. Not sure what to do about that.

My para (I'll call her January, an obvious pseudonym for her actual name) was gone AGAIN. My principal already told me she was going to talk to her. I think she has a s--t immune system, and she's not just skipping, but is simply sick a lot. And she misses a lot because her kids are sick. They're plenty old enough to stay home on their own to be honest. And I don't know, maybe her husband could stay home once in a while? They might be valid excuses, but I can't run my room when part of my team is missing so much. We are getting to know each other and the kids well enough so that we don't even have to always talk. We just know what to do. And January really brings the get up and go. She's wonderful when she's there, but she's missed probably a total of 4 weeks so far this year. It's ridiculous. That's half a quarter. My principal said she's doing an informal documentation and having a chat with January and telling her to make a commitment or she won't be able to stay. She's aware I'd like to keep my para, but I do think a talk is in order.

The good news is that I am finally stabilized on my medication. I hope to avoid taking this other one that is a wonderful pill, but it makes me hungry ALL the frickin time. All I do is eat. It also raises blood sugar and other bad things. If I stay stable and peaceful, I won't need it.

Time for bed. It's past my bedtime.